Three lessons about work I learned while recovering
Being away from work for eight weeks wasn’t something I planned. Recovering from surgery for a herniated disc, I expected the time off to be physically demanding. What I didn’t expect was how much it would challenge my relationship with work—and by extension, my sense of identity.
Work has always been a significant part of who I am. It’s where I create, connect, and contribute. But those eight weeks forced me to confront a difficult question: Without work, who am I?
This isn’t a unique struggle. In a world where we’re told to “separate work from life,” the reality is that work often defines us. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. In fact, I believe the era of new work—a time of unprecedented flexibility, purpose-driven roles, and blurred lines between personal and professional life—offers an opportunity to embrace this connection in a healthier, more intentional way.
Here are three lessons my recovery taught me about work, identity, and leadership in this era of transformation.
Lesson 1: Work does define us — But it shouldn’t consume us
During my time away, I had to face something uncomfortable: much of my sense of purpose was tied to my ability to contribute at work. Without it, I felt untethered. But as the weeks passed, I realized this wasn’t because work had taken over my life. It was because work had become a meaningful extension of my identity. The problem isn’t that work defines us—it’s that we often let it consume us. When we over-prioritize productivity or external validation, we lose sight of the deeper purpose work can serve:
- The pride of mastering a skill or craft.
- The joy of building meaningful connections.
- The fulfillment of contributing to something larger than ourselves.
In the era of new work, where flexibility is a norm and purpose is a priority, we have a chance to redefine how work fits into our lives. Instead of letting it overwhelm us, we can allow it to complement who we are.
Ask yourself: Does my current relationship with work reflect the person I want to be?
Lesson 2: New work requires new structures, not just new buzzwords
Flexibility and autonomy are two of the most celebrated ideas in new work. But during my recovery, I found myself reflecting on what makes flexibility meaningful. True flexibility isn’t just about working from anywhere; it’s about having systems that enable people to thrive. Whether you’re recovering from surgery or leading a high-performing team, success comes down to having clear goals, supportive structures, and the freedom to execute without micromanagement.
Harvard Business Review refers to this as “bounded autonomy”: the balance between giving people ownership of their work while providing enough clarity and support to ensure success. Leaders who master this balance create workplaces where purpose and productivity coexist.
Ask yourself: Am I, as a leader, empowering my team with clear expectations and the freedom to succeed? And do I have the systems I need to focus on what matters most?
Lesson 3: Work isn’t the problem, our metrics are
As I started to recover, I found myself itching to get back to work. But why? It wasn’t because I missed the emails or meetings. It was because I missed the sense of progress, the feeling of moving the needle—not just for myself, but for others.
This got me thinking: How do we define success at work? For too long, success has been tied to output—hours logged, emails sent, or tasks completed. But in the era of new work, those metrics fall short. Real success is about:
- Impact: What change am I creating through my work?
- Alignment: How does my work reflect my values and goals?
- Legacy: What relationships, innovations, or contributions am I leaving behind?
Ask yourself: Are my current measures of success meaningful? How can I redefine them to reflect the life I want to lead?
The Takeaway: Work as a mirror, not a burden
Work has the power to shape us—not just in what we accomplish, but in who we become. My time away taught me that work doesn’t have to be something we escape from. Instead, it can be a mirror, reflecting the values we live by, the relationships we nurture, and the impact we leave behind.But this doesn’t happen by accident. In the era of new work, we have to consciously design our relationship with work:
- To redefine success in a way that aligns with our personal and professional goals.
- To integrate it into our identity without letting it consume us.
- To build systems that support both autonomy and accountability.
Your Reflection: What does work mean to you?
As you think about your own relationship with work, here are a few questions to consider:
- What story does my work tell about who I am?
- Do my current metrics for success reflect what I truly value?
- How can I, as a leader, create systems that empower others to thrive?
Work is a part of who we are—but it’s up to us to decide what kind of story it tells.
If you’re feeling stuck, questioning your career path, or want to align your work with your purpose, let’s talk. Through 1:1 mentoring at Mentavora, I help professionals like you rediscover their vision, amplify their impact, and redefine success on their terms. Let’s take this journey together with a free 30-minute clarity call.
